Today was disappointing in the way only being so close to target can be. 1 second a mile off target during heat and humidity is not bad especially when still really tired but being so close still bites.
GPS app decided to ignore me saying stop and enlarge the map instead at the end, so glad I took note of the details before it did this to log. Faffing around for 15 seconds while stationary doesn't help the displayed pace.
7.05 miles in 53:01 8mph pace 7:31 min mile
31 July 2015
30 July 2015
Running 30-Jul-2015
Temperature was a lot nicer, aka cooler, today, humidity was the highest all year and only broke when the clouds overhead decided I needed a thoroughly heavy shower. By the end of the run there was no doubt they were right. This did have the unfortunate side effect of making the off road part of my run more than a tad slippery but I stayed upright and didn't die so all's good. Overall 3 seconds off pace which I will have to accept for today, there's no choice really.
7.01 mile in 52:58 speed 7.9mph pace 7:33 min mile
7.01 mile in 52:58 speed 7.9mph pace 7:33 min mile
29 July 2015
Running 29-Jul-2015
Despite feeling more like going to sleep than going for a run I did it anyway. One of my colleagues, the slower of the pace setters, asked if I was going and I decided what the heck. Knowing it wasn't going to be awesome I did the same as recently for the other colleague who comes along more often by simply helping him get in a good run. This meant it was slow for me but in all honesty I think anything that would have really pushed me at the moment would have been stupid.
Stuff that has been messing with my ability to do weights recently is now over so I should be able to be back to that too, which will be good. Ordinarily the situation would have been ideal as I had anger and aggression to spare but I am still on the moderate time slot I promised myself so couldn't go full on as I would have needed to and decided to do nothing rather than risk injury. I will regret this soon enough when I ache like hell doing stuff that I would still consider moderate but that's life.
6.37 miles in 56:05 speed 6.8mph pace 8:48 min mile beat doing nothing
Stuff that has been messing with my ability to do weights recently is now over so I should be able to be back to that too, which will be good. Ordinarily the situation would have been ideal as I had anger and aggression to spare but I am still on the moderate time slot I promised myself so couldn't go full on as I would have needed to and decided to do nothing rather than risk injury. I will regret this soon enough when I ache like hell doing stuff that I would still consider moderate but that's life.
6.37 miles in 56:05 speed 6.8mph pace 8:48 min mile beat doing nothing
23 July 2015
Running 23-Jul-2015
Very close today, just a second a mile off pace, which is simple code for downright annoying to have been so close and still missed it.
7.03 miles in 52:57 speed 8mph pace 7:31 min mile
7.03 miles in 52:57 speed 8mph pace 7:31 min mile
22 July 2015
Speaking Ill Of the Dead
This has made me unpopular a few times and the fact others seem to have decided to idealise a person who caused me a lot of pain in my life is causing me more than a little distress at the moment.
The person concerned is my father and while some of the below is very minor in the eyes of many, the collective effect is something I spent years recovering from.
While married to my mother they found she was pregnant. She knew she wasn't ready to be a mum so wanted to abort, he pressured her into keeping me. In itself not horrendous but when you have married someone and forced them into keeping a child they knew they weren't ready for it is more than a little cowardly to run away from both of these commitments. The relationship was ended due to irreconcilable differences, aka both having affairs and in truth this was likely going on before I was born on his part. Those with high ideals regarding anti-abortion, please thank your parents for a very happy life, only people with one could be so ignorant. Also consider over 95% or 'saved' abortions attempt suicide multiple times then consider how well they have really been saved.
My mother got custody, whether this is the best thing that could have happened I will never know but he got full visitation rights and I know how much effort she put in to make him an active part of my life. Active part doesn't mean saying you will be there and not turning up so many times for so many years the zero confidence child eventually responds to 'I'll see you on Friday' with 'Which Friday?' before turning and walking away. If you aren't pretty close to 100% sure you can keep the promise, don't make it. You feel far less worthless if someone says they'll be in touch about a visit than if they continuously don't turn up when they say they will.
One of the milestone moments in most children's lives is when they first learn to ride a bike without stabilisers. Something my mother could have done but felt would be good to have my dad to to give me a positive memory I could link to him. My moment of pride and joy at managing this after trying for some time was only equaled by my disappointment when I saw he considered this was job done and could then get going back to his new family.
Knowing that for years I lived literally 5 minutes away from a junction he passed on his way to and from work, yet still couldn't be bothered to come in to see me.
My mother was no bargain either and as is not uncommon in my home town at 16 years old I was kicked out of home. I couple of months later my dad turned up to visit, not to check on my well being, just to find out how long I had been living alone as my mother hadn't notified him and was still collecting maintenance payments. Visit length was minutes which considering he would have spent over an hour travelling each way to find this out, left no doubt of it's purpose.
In order to get through stuff like this you have to let it go, so when he apologised under the influence of a lot of alcohol I gave him a clean slate. I had long accepted I was a part of his life he regretted having happened and saw no point clinging to it. There are people who will say being over things means it never effecting you again, this is wrong, that is burying it, being over it is dealing with something and moving on.
I did tend to think my life was the only one he was prepared to mess up. After all his new wife was keeping to the agreement made, looking after the house, bringing up the children and letting him be the provider. I was, as I often am, wrong. His system of viewing marriage as a casual thing hadn't changed. He was happily sleeping around and would have left his second wife and family too if my sister (half sister really) hadn't insisted he stay. He did so but I would never declare he would have done so faithfully.
When I noticed he was starting to make the same promises to my son and not keep them as he had to me I started cutting him short and telling him to give us a call when he would be available to visit us again. That was the biggest mark on his cleaned slate, damaging my life was bad enough, doing so to my son would never be allowed. My son's reaction to his death has been that it won't bother him as he never knew him, in truth I have to agree and would say neither do I.
When he died I was slightly relieved. We visited him a few weeks ago, when he was still lucid which was no small feat because he is a long way from my home. The thought of going to visit him again to spend minutes in his company then go back again for a funeral was filling me with dread, hence the relief. This feeling reminded me of the many times in my youth I wished him dead and how angry and upset he'd made me so many times. When asked by the person who will speak at his funeral for things I remembered about him I realised there is not a single happy memory in my mind associated to him. The net effect is I have been struggling a lot mentally lately and realise the lessons I have learned from my father are all how not to live and treat people.
Sorry but when someone lives there life being a total a hole then dies, they don't become perfect, they just change from being a live a hole to a dead one.
The person concerned is my father and while some of the below is very minor in the eyes of many, the collective effect is something I spent years recovering from.
While married to my mother they found she was pregnant. She knew she wasn't ready to be a mum so wanted to abort, he pressured her into keeping me. In itself not horrendous but when you have married someone and forced them into keeping a child they knew they weren't ready for it is more than a little cowardly to run away from both of these commitments. The relationship was ended due to irreconcilable differences, aka both having affairs and in truth this was likely going on before I was born on his part. Those with high ideals regarding anti-abortion, please thank your parents for a very happy life, only people with one could be so ignorant. Also consider over 95% or 'saved' abortions attempt suicide multiple times then consider how well they have really been saved.
My mother got custody, whether this is the best thing that could have happened I will never know but he got full visitation rights and I know how much effort she put in to make him an active part of my life. Active part doesn't mean saying you will be there and not turning up so many times for so many years the zero confidence child eventually responds to 'I'll see you on Friday' with 'Which Friday?' before turning and walking away. If you aren't pretty close to 100% sure you can keep the promise, don't make it. You feel far less worthless if someone says they'll be in touch about a visit than if they continuously don't turn up when they say they will.
One of the milestone moments in most children's lives is when they first learn to ride a bike without stabilisers. Something my mother could have done but felt would be good to have my dad to to give me a positive memory I could link to him. My moment of pride and joy at managing this after trying for some time was only equaled by my disappointment when I saw he considered this was job done and could then get going back to his new family.
Knowing that for years I lived literally 5 minutes away from a junction he passed on his way to and from work, yet still couldn't be bothered to come in to see me.
My mother was no bargain either and as is not uncommon in my home town at 16 years old I was kicked out of home. I couple of months later my dad turned up to visit, not to check on my well being, just to find out how long I had been living alone as my mother hadn't notified him and was still collecting maintenance payments. Visit length was minutes which considering he would have spent over an hour travelling each way to find this out, left no doubt of it's purpose.
In order to get through stuff like this you have to let it go, so when he apologised under the influence of a lot of alcohol I gave him a clean slate. I had long accepted I was a part of his life he regretted having happened and saw no point clinging to it. There are people who will say being over things means it never effecting you again, this is wrong, that is burying it, being over it is dealing with something and moving on.
I did tend to think my life was the only one he was prepared to mess up. After all his new wife was keeping to the agreement made, looking after the house, bringing up the children and letting him be the provider. I was, as I often am, wrong. His system of viewing marriage as a casual thing hadn't changed. He was happily sleeping around and would have left his second wife and family too if my sister (half sister really) hadn't insisted he stay. He did so but I would never declare he would have done so faithfully.
When I noticed he was starting to make the same promises to my son and not keep them as he had to me I started cutting him short and telling him to give us a call when he would be available to visit us again. That was the biggest mark on his cleaned slate, damaging my life was bad enough, doing so to my son would never be allowed. My son's reaction to his death has been that it won't bother him as he never knew him, in truth I have to agree and would say neither do I.
When he died I was slightly relieved. We visited him a few weeks ago, when he was still lucid which was no small feat because he is a long way from my home. The thought of going to visit him again to spend minutes in his company then go back again for a funeral was filling me with dread, hence the relief. This feeling reminded me of the many times in my youth I wished him dead and how angry and upset he'd made me so many times. When asked by the person who will speak at his funeral for things I remembered about him I realised there is not a single happy memory in my mind associated to him. The net effect is I have been struggling a lot mentally lately and realise the lessons I have learned from my father are all how not to live and treat people.
Sorry but when someone lives there life being a total a hole then dies, they don't become perfect, they just change from being a live a hole to a dead one.
Running 22-Jul-2015
Needed this so badly. Having serious trouble removing head from rectum at the moment so a good run was very welcome.
Temperature down a bit, humidity still insane but an on target run and a happy runner.
7.03 miles in 52:47 speed 8mph pace 7:30 min mile
Temperature down a bit, humidity still insane but an on target run and a happy runner.
7.03 miles in 52:47 speed 8mph pace 7:30 min mile
20 July 2015
Running 20-Jul-2015
Weekend involved getting a few tons of the back garden to the tip, made all the more interesting by adding some rain to make it a touch heavier to move.
Run wasn't great but beat doing nothing hands down.
7.02 miles in 55:17 speed 7.6mph pace 7:52 min mile
Run wasn't great but beat doing nothing hands down.
7.02 miles in 55:17 speed 7.6mph pace 7:52 min mile
17 July 2015
Running 17-Jul-2015
Set off a bit ambitious meaning I was doing quite well the first half, then ended up not much better than yesterday by the end. Worth a try, but ended up 7 seconds a mile behind target.
7.06 miles in 53:53 speed 7.9mph pace 7:37 min mile.
7.06 miles in 53:53 speed 7.9mph pace 7:37 min mile.
16 July 2015
Running 16-Jul-2015
Heat went up speed went down. No surprises there then. 8 seconds a mile off pace will have to do for today, there was nothing left to give.
I might be getting a new pace setter soon, one who will likely be faster than me either straight away or very shortly so really give me something to aim for.
7.06 miles in 53:55 speed 7.9mph pace 7:38 min mile
I might be getting a new pace setter soon, one who will likely be faster than me either straight away or very shortly so really give me something to aim for.
7.06 miles in 53:55 speed 7.9mph pace 7:38 min mile
14 July 2015
Intervals 14-Jul-2015
There are some marks on the road where I do intervals so I was able to monitor how regular my intervals were today which was quite something. Up until the last 2 they were all pretty consistent and they were a touch short, all round I couldn't have asked for better.
3.9 mile in 33:23 average speed 7mph
3.9 mile in 33:23 average speed 7mph
13 July 2015
Running 13-Jul-2015
Bit cooler today 17 celcuis so only just over melting point. App only seems to be showing humidity at 100% daily regardless at the moment, considering the mist and rain I would say this was understated.
Still closest to an on target run I have had in a while though, so I'll take that. 2 seconds a mile off pace.
7.04 miles in 53:05 speed 8mph pace 7:32 min mile.
Still closest to an on target run I have had in a while though, so I'll take that. 2 seconds a mile off pace.
7.04 miles in 53:05 speed 8mph pace 7:32 min mile.
10 July 2015
Running 10-Jul-2015
Another week that has been far from ideal on the training front. Life has a habit of really getting in the way sometimes. I'll pay for it when I get back into the flow and this isn't the first time life has got in the way of training, neither will it be the last.
So knowing I wasn't going to be blistering today I decided to help out one of my running buddies instead. Ended up pulling him along to his longest run by nearly half a mile and at his fastest pace even comparing to the shorter runs. So not spectacular for me but means I now have someone who will likely be really pushing me in a matter of months full distance, well worth it.
7.04 miles in 57:37 speed 7.3mph pace 8:11 min mile This guy is seriously catching me up.
So knowing I wasn't going to be blistering today I decided to help out one of my running buddies instead. Ended up pulling him along to his longest run by nearly half a mile and at his fastest pace even comparing to the shorter runs. So not spectacular for me but means I now have someone who will likely be really pushing me in a matter of months full distance, well worth it.
7.04 miles in 57:37 speed 7.3mph pace 8:11 min mile This guy is seriously catching me up.
7 July 2015
Intervals 07-Jul-2015
Squats got postponed when I realised some of the delightful creatures that bit or stung me over the weekend have something in them I am allergic to and my lower legs had swollen up like balloons, especially the left.
It has gone down quite a bit now, using elevation etc. to help. Not painful, just irritating and leaving my feet feeling dead on occasion.
Meant this interval session I was a bit less fatigued and able to give it more energy. I did and feel thoroughly shattered now. Sprints were very consistent, recovery felt good, end of each I felt comfortably ready to go flat out again, though the further through I got the later this was occurring and the last couple breathing leveled out just in time.
3.96 miles in 33:06 average speed 7.2mph
It has gone down quite a bit now, using elevation etc. to help. Not painful, just irritating and leaving my feet feeling dead on occasion.
Meant this interval session I was a bit less fatigued and able to give it more energy. I did and feel thoroughly shattered now. Sprints were very consistent, recovery felt good, end of each I felt comfortably ready to go flat out again, though the further through I got the later this was occurring and the last couple breathing leveled out just in time.
3.96 miles in 33:06 average speed 7.2mph
6 July 2015
Running 06-Jul-2015
Cooler than Friday, more humid than Friday net effect on me was a drop of pace 1 second a mile, meaning I was 6 seconds a mile off target pace. Lungs are telling me there was no more to give so I guess I will accept that, but as with any weakness I hate having pathetic lungs.
7.02 miles in 53:26 speed 7.9mph pace 7:36 min mile
7.02 miles in 53:26 speed 7.9mph pace 7:36 min mile
3 July 2015
Running 03-July-2015
Figured out how to stop the app switching off and got a more accurate distance, which was good.
It was cooler than Wednesday which helped, still roasting but there is a huge difference between 24 and 30 centigrade. Humidity was still there of course. Water bottle is helping against heat, if not my breathing.
Pace setter worked a blinder today, 1/2 mile shorter run than mine and I could see him at a number of points on the run back making me work all the harder, got back just a few seconds ahead of him, both of us did well considering the heat. 5 seconds a mile off target pace but i'll take that over Wednesdays poor attempt any day.
7.04 miles in 53:25 speed 7.9mph pace 7:35 min mile
It was cooler than Wednesday which helped, still roasting but there is a huge difference between 24 and 30 centigrade. Humidity was still there of course. Water bottle is helping against heat, if not my breathing.
Pace setter worked a blinder today, 1/2 mile shorter run than mine and I could see him at a number of points on the run back making me work all the harder, got back just a few seconds ahead of him, both of us did well considering the heat. 5 seconds a mile off target pace but i'll take that over Wednesdays poor attempt any day.
7.04 miles in 53:25 speed 7.9mph pace 7:35 min mile
1 July 2015
Deadlift 01-Jul-2015
I forgot the last and only other time I did this type of sessions was in winter. I tend to leak rather than sweat and that caused metro abandon the 4th circuit, when I can't grip because the sweat is literally washing away my chalk faster than I can apply it there's no choice.
3 circuits 10 reps each no rest except swig of water at end of circuit or to chalk
Deadlift with fat gripz 90kg
Upright row low pulley 30kg
Single arm kettlebell swings change with catch at top
Narrow grip chins
3 circuits 10 reps each no rest except swig of water at end of circuit or to chalk
Deadlift with fat gripz 90kg
Upright row low pulley 30kg
Single arm kettlebell swings change with catch at top
Narrow grip chins
Running 01-Jul-2015
Officially at my evaporating point today, 30 C or 86 F. Humidity hasn't dropped below 100% in a while now and it was right up there today.
I took along a little runners water bottle which helped a bit by enabling me to finish but I was feeling sick with the heat at a couple of points. Time was appalling but in fairness I am just happy to have made it around, as a cold weather runner this is killing me.
Latest update to running app is to automatically set the phone to power save, which is OK as I don't really need the screen on etc. but it has also meant it is less accurate on the GPS tracking by checking my position less often. I know the run is 7 miles anyway, sometimes the app says more other times less but the same route is the same distance.
6.94 miles in 56:46 speed 7.3mph pace 8:10 min mile
I took along a little runners water bottle which helped a bit by enabling me to finish but I was feeling sick with the heat at a couple of points. Time was appalling but in fairness I am just happy to have made it around, as a cold weather runner this is killing me.
Latest update to running app is to automatically set the phone to power save, which is OK as I don't really need the screen on etc. but it has also meant it is less accurate on the GPS tracking by checking my position less often. I know the run is 7 miles anyway, sometimes the app says more other times less but the same route is the same distance.
6.94 miles in 56:46 speed 7.3mph pace 8:10 min mile
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