The heaviest metal never rusts

OK the title of the blog pertains to my enjoying heavy metal and I guess it's time to make the confession absolute. I am a true headbanger, and as stated in the book How to be a complete wally, not all wallys are headbangers but all headbangers are wallys.

There is something deeply strange about anyone enjoying music that inspires you shake your brains into submission for several hours or slam into each other grinning inanely. This guy forgot to stop headbanging long enough to eat.

Metalheads are also quite a strange crew as well, either pushed out to the borders of society or going there voluntarily to escape the mainstream. The music is generally powerful and aggressive even if the lyrics are about peace and love, which confuses the heck out of anyone from outside the metal fraternity if they listen hard enough to realise.

There is a sense of humour that goes with metal too that most don't get. It's insulting to everyone and everything especially metalheads themselves, who we stereotype as sub intelligent tattooed apes wearing clothes held together by frayed edges and various piercings.
Some examples.
Why are people more offended by fur than leather? Because it's easier to pick on rich old women than motorbike gangs.
An old friend of mine told me the thing liked most about metal was the women looked like women, unfortunately so do the blokes. After some time he also shared this insight with one hairy beomoth who terrified him at first, and found him laughing along.
In contrast another friend of mine coming to the club for the first time was very excited to see 2 women being intimate on the dancefloor. Not so much however when the one with legs and butt he fancied turned out to have a goatee beard and was stable enough with his sexuality to be out in a black minidress without caring.

I am too old for the long hair anymore, going bald and even as a metal head with virtually no style I have enough to avoid the long hair at sides and back with none on top. Dress sense is not difficult in the true metal world, keep clothes forever and keep wearing them, if bits fall of your clothes you can patch them but this is optional. If you really care about how you look in the t-shirt you were wearing in school that only fits because of the rips, you don't qualify.

I like my music how I like my training, hard and heavy. Like most metalheads I love classical music if it shares the same power and passion, a quick you tube search will show you many heavy metal versions of classical music and many of the best performers practice with classical pieces to gain the skills they need to keep up with demands of metal.
Yes a lot of it is loud, obnoxious noise, and not good for background music. There is a good reason for this, metalheads do not want music to be background noise, they want to be affected and inspired by it.
There are such a variety of metal tracks covering true love, hatred of war, sex, and of course humour, which is often offensive. There are many who think metal is about encouraging violence, which would of course explain Metallica's One among many others, or satanic like Rob Zombie's Living dead girl. These will always be people who have never listened to the words and realised that living dead girl and most others like it are intended as a mick take, unfortunately some of those who do listen to a few of them haven't reached the punch line yet either.

I find training is better to heavier tunes too, the aggression in the music helps me unlock my own and lift more than I would without it. I use similar music when running or cycling and have had to learn not to mime along with all of the words, especially Faith No More gentle art of making enemies and the like, people can get offended when lip-reading, not good.